This lecture discusses the Islamic perspective on temporary marriage, known as mut'ah, explaining its rules, purpose, and misconceptions surrounding it. The speaker clarifies how mut'ah functions as a legitimate contract designed to protect individuals from unlawful relationships while emphasizing the importance of divine supervision and sincerity. The discussion also addresses social realities, gender dynamics, and the psychological benefits of structured marriage within Islam.
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم وصلى الله على سيدنا محمد وعلى آله الطيبين الطاهرين. اللهم صل على محمد وال محمد. Inshallah today we're going to talk about a subject has too much pressure into it, has a lot of controversies, has a lot of debate. It has been the debate for few the 20 last years. It've been the subject for a time always in a school of thought why we believe on it. And why we always push the pressure, the especially the young generation, if they're going to be into relationship to always commit to it.
Why? Because we're trying to provide something called zina or fornication. Now, what in this subject is going to be inshallah about the the marriage of mut'ah? What is it exactly? And why Allah Azza'waJall has it in the Quran in this form? And is it bad for the culture? Is it bad for the ladies? Is it bad for the men? Are people these days taking advantage of that kind of marriage? Are taking advantage of our ladies?
Our ladies now, they're saying we each one of us, for example, the other school of thought you will sit with you, you will say you are a Shi'a then you are the son of mut'ah immediately without thinking and without realizing what exactly he is saying. So, I'm going to reflect fast because this subject is always you have been consumed so much in regarding where Allah Azza'waJall mentioned it and why the other school of thought are saying this is not I'm going to be like talking from my view and from the other school of thought view and we're going to reflect fast and why this is affecting our youth and how is it affected by?
So, I hope we can give every single subject from this subject, big subject, its own right. Allah Azza'waJall in the Quran said about this in Surah an-Nisa he talked about this subject specifically. He said from Surah an-Nisa number 24, well muhsanatu I'm going to mention it in Arabic like usually and then I'll mention it in English. before there was something called milk al-yamin. Milk al-yamin is different than regular marriage even the mut'ah marriage is something completely.
Now these days nobody commit to milk al-yamin because this is where he a man or woman, for example, if they're a servant and like serving someone, there will be milk al-yamin. For example, a lady, she can take off her scarf instead of her in in her master and she can even take her scarf out regularly, like when she go outside or exit the house. She can still take her scarf out. Why? Because she is owned by someone. Allah Azza'waJall, why he is he mentioned this in the holy Quran? Because before then it was completely different than now.
Before then it was all the economy is based on slavery and Allah Azza'waJall he does not want slavery anymore. So the only way to take away this slavery is by marrying letting those ladies who are been enslaved, marry their masters. This way why they will have their own حقوق, their own their rights. They Allah Azza'waJall wants for the woman to take her rights. Before Islam, even different Christianity, Judaism, even in those two religion, Allah Azza'waJall gave them rights.
But the people who are governing those two religion are they were taking the rights back. That's why there was no rights completely in the Arabian Peninsula, even in Europe, even in any other place, if we study all history. But I'm not going to talk about milk al-yamin, we continue. Inside this ayats, Allah Azza'waJall if we continue he say And Allah Azza'waJall he is talking about something called whatever you did this marriage that cause mut'ah you see Allah Azza'waJall even he mentioned the name
this is mean mut'ah. You see, istimta' mean mut'ah in Arabic. If you between verb and adverb. If you take the verb, the right verb, it is will be mut'ah. So, Allah Azza'waJall he is saying something here, he is saying something about before there was regular marriage. Regular marriage is you have to bring witnesses, you have to go do it publicly, you have to all this thing whatever, whatever we do it these days and the different marriage is is a little different.
What is different between those two? The the different between those two is the the second one, the mut'ah marriage is doesn't you don't have to have witnesses. You don't have to have witnesses. Why? Because there there is something between the man or the lady, for example, they have emotions, they have it their relationship come to the intense point and they don't want to, for example, take it to the level that they want to build a family.
They don't want to build a family. So they can they can just take it to that point. Or if they want to build a family, they can even get this marriage and they can build a family regarding this marriage.
Now, I'm going to talk about it from this point of view. Because Allah when he always reveals something, he doesn't reveal it for your case only. Many people they always have this misconception.
For example, in salah, in some, in zakat. That's why for when in the time of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam, the salah was separated. For example, Dhuhr, they used to pray and later they pray Asr.
And then he prayed few time Dhuhr and Asr together. Why? Because for the future people when they come, they have a intense life like now. If you go to to different countries, for example, to Saudi Arabia, to those countries, you see how they pray.
For example, they go do salah al-Dhuhr, they close everything. They shut everything up. And then there's they go back to their houses. Stay 10 more minutes and then they do the adhan for Asr.
So they close everything down, they go to salah al-Asr and then they leave to the houses. Stay 1.631, So, this is a like fast reflection about about what we say and how they say, and if this is mentioned in the Quran or not. Now if you want to reflect this subject, saying what's happening these days? What's happening these days is, for example, someone will come to you, especially a guy.
You will tell him, do you pray? He will say, no. Do you fast? He will say, no. Do you do zakat? A lot? No. Do you know who is Allah? No. So, do you know, do you do any do you know anything about Mut'ah? He says, yes, I'm married Mut'ah. And then, and then you say, you will start saying, okay, if you don't do any, you don't know anything about your religion, and then you're married Mut'ah. Can you define what Mut'ah is for me? He said, I don't really know.
They say it's halal, I found this lady, we agreed to do Mut'ah, and that's it. In reality, Mut'ah has principles and it has certain type of laws that they govern this type of marriage. The regular marriage is exactly the same thing like Mut'ah, like I said. For example, if a lady married Mut'ah for someone, she cannot divorce him, and in one hour go marry someone else. She has to wait for her to her 'Iddah to finish.
And she has to wait three months or two and a half months. She her period has to come twice, and third time, and then she can go get married to someone else. For example, one time I was listening in a TV in a Christian program, and then this she she claimed she's a Shia, and then she said, I I marry 10 guys a month Mut'ah. And that and that guy told her, how did you how do you do that? What about your emotion? She said, I don't care about emotion, I'm more physical.
And there was a sheikh in in front of her, and the sheikh starts saying, no, you know, our guys they don't do that, our ladies they're respectful, so and so. Well, he forgot to say that she cannot do that. You know, we nobody should care, when he was explaining that whatever she was doing, bad or not bad, he should say the first thing you cannot do that because you have to have your own 'Iddah three months for you to marry someone else.
It is exactly like the same marriage. In other school of thought, they say they say they have this thing, they say, for example, if you want to come to a lady, okay? And you're not interested to make a family with her, but you're what you're interested and you have this physical feeling. So what do you do? You go do regular marriage, but in your intention, you want to divorce her the second week. Okay, you want to divorce her the second week.
So he will marry her one week and then he will divorce her. So we ask him, what is the difference between Mut'ah and this marriage anymore? There's no difference. Because the Mut'ah is a marriage with the intention of divorce later. And with this with this marriage that the other school of thought, they do it, they do it the same way. For example, you want to marry this girl for one week and then you want to divorce her.
In reality, in Mut'ah, it it's still the lady know about the time. For example, we have to set the time. Many, many guys they make a big mistake. What do they do? For example, the one when they go to Mut'ah, they say, we're going to marry you till next maybe until uh they fire whoever from that company. You cannot say that, you cannot put a time that it's tied to something else. You have to specify what time. For example, I'm marry you, I'm going to marry you till next year, like this, like today, and you know what is is exactly today.
You cannot say I'm going to marry you till you find someone else. You see there's many like there is misconception about that and it's haram to do that. In Mut'ah, you should specify an exact time and you should work on it. In the others in other religion, in other school of thought, they do the the the regular marriage and the lady she will not know that this guy is going to divorce her after one week. So the contract now here is bad by itself.
In Shia, you cannot do that. You cannot marry a woman that you're going to divorce her after one week, and then when you when you divorce her, she does not know about the time, you know? She should know that there's a contract. That's why Allah, he said what? He said the the is a contract. by itself is a contract. Do you understand what contract means? I'm just going to define it a little bit. Contract mean why we care so much about marriage.
I don't want to talk about building institution, I don't want to talk about all these things. Allah, how he look about to this contract. When you, for example, when you marry someone, this lady, especially in our school of thought, if you if someone get married, she will say zawaj to nafsi. A a guy, he does not say zawaj to why? Because it is Allah, he care about the woman's opinion more than the man opinion, that's why the lady, she will repeat it twice, and then the guy will say qabiltu zawij.
I accept you offering yourself to me in this way. That's why Allah, he put this, he handled this matter to the ladies. Why? Because they should give the permission for the guy to marry them or not. Or otherwise in another school of thought, it is the man who puts this permission. You see? Even in Zawaj al-Mut'ah, it's exactly the same thing. The guy, he does not offer himself in this way; the lady, she will say, for example, zawajtuka nafsi,
she will say, I will let you marry me, and then the guy, he will say, I accept. Why? Because she has to know about this contract. And this is permitted by Allah, for example. How is it termed permission? Now a guy, he has a contract with a lady, okay? And everything is fine. Now we're having something like called boyfriend, girlfriend system. But Allah, to make it legitimate, Allah, he has to supervise it. You see? For example, when do you go to the restaurant to eat halal food?
What is the difference between halal food and haram food? The halal food is, before you go do the, you have to say bismillah, Allahu Akbar, and you turn it to the Qiblah, right? What you're doing here, you're taking the permission of Allah, of what? Of eating this piece. You're taking the permission because Allah, he said, I permit you to eat halal. So the halal, what will be here, will be by his permission, under his supervision.
So you ask him the permission and then you do it. In any contract, when you go do a contract, you have to take the permission of Allah. This is why when we say, for example, before you eating food, you have to say bismillahirrahmanirrahim. Why? Because Allah now, he is supervising your food. And we have a narration that says, if you eat your food and you don't say bismillahirrahmanirrahim, the jinn that live with you, the Iblis that lives with you, he will eat the essence of this food.
So you don't have the barakah of this food anymore. You see, this is the difference between bismillahirrahmanirrahim and no bismillahirrahmanirrahim. Why you are letting Allah permit that for you and bless this for you. So, same thing with this marriage. You are allowing Allah to supervise it, to supervise this contract, and to what? And to bless it at the same time. So whatever will happen with this contract, it will be something that has benefits and in a good way.
So, for example, now we sit with different people, they say, we don't believe in this marriage. Allah, he didn't say in the Quran that you believing in this marriage or you don't believe in this marriage, it's going to make a difference. Because if you believe in it, and you don't want to use it, it's fine with him, it's not something necessary for you to believe in Shia or to reject Shia. You know, for example, now we live in the West, even if we live in the East, many people, for example, they go to different universities, and they start to have feelings for some lady.
And over here it's a very open society. You have to, for example, to go with a lady, date her or something. We don't believe in something called dating. It is haram for us to do dating in this form. Physical dating and so on. Allah, he wants to supervise that. And by the way, when a person marries someone, a regular marriage or mut'ah, that person has to believe in God. For example, even if you date an American lady, you cannot date her and marry her in regular or mut'ah, if she does not believe in God.
Some people here they just go and they say our belief to the lady, they say, our belief is I cannot touch you without the contract, with God's supervision. And they will say, okay, you know, this is your belief, I don't mind, you can do it this way. But they didn't ask the lady if she believes in Allah or not. For you to marry a lady, she has to believe in Allah. Allah, he mentioned that in the Quran. Don't think that those people, even if they look attractive and beautiful, they will be good for you.
You are good for them. You see, Allah is honoring you because when you believe in Allah, you are higher than someone who doesn't believe in it. So you shouldn't give yourself for them even if you are attracted to them. This is an honor for you. Some people they say this is a restriction. In reality Allah is honoring you. By what? If you see a different verse, Rasulullah is saying about a woman when she is like having hijab or so on,
so he's talking about nisa Rasul, not in this form, like in the form that Rasulullah is responsible for those ladies. Responsible for life. Some people they say Allah didn't mention this verse in the Quran about hijab. In reality he did, but he was saying that those people are related to Rasulullah. You see, look how important it is, it's very important if you connect all this together. Why? Because even if you don't think, there are many narrations that say, a man, if he does not have the form of
jealousy for his household in the form that he wants them to be closer to Allah, then a woman shouldn't trust him anymore. Why? Because if he doesn't care about her, who's going to care about her? Who's going to care about her? Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam is going to care about her. Why? Because she is from his nation. From the nation of Islam, not necessarily from Islam, the black, the African American one.
No, from the nation of Rasulullah. So all women, they have more rights than men. Why? Because they are related to Rasulullah from that, and he is the protector. This is what Allah Azza wa Jall mentioned in the Quran. For men, he always says, man do that, man oh man, oh man, change that. But when it comes to the woman, you see Rasulullah there somewhere. You see in that ayah somewhere there, he is referring to they are the protected source, the protected of Rasulullah.
It's protected by him. They are representing his nation. And he always, when he used to talk to and teach and give the teachings, he said, do not harm a woman. A woman, ladies are like glass. If you hit this glass, it will be what? Immediately will break. Their emotions are like that. Do not harm them. This is how he talked in this form. Subhanallah, and if you look at Surah Nur, Allahu nurus-samawati wal-ard. Masaluhu kamishkatin
if you look at this surah, you say fi zujaajah. You see inside this nur, Allahu nur, I'm sorry, Allahu nurus-samawati wal-ard. Masaluhu kamishkatin. If you ever read this surah, inside the surah you will see uz-zujaajah twice. And Rasulullah, and we have a narration from Ahl al-Bayt saying this zujaajah is Sayyida Zahra Salamullah Alayha. Always when Allah Azza wa Jall talks about a lady, he mentions crystal, zujaaj.
They're very beautiful, but at the same time they're very delicate. Be careful while you're handling them. You see? You have to connect this with that. If you want to just search for the physical relationship, then you shouldn't be allowing yourself for emotions. And Allah Azza wa Jall is bringing this subject with this kind of marriage. Because look, this has happened here in Dearborn. A man, he's always interested in a lady's physical way, and maybe he had success, some of them they're very trained in how to get the lady, but they don't use religion.
You see? Because this is how they are and they bring people, people who are like them. So he met a lady and he was interested in her physically, and she refused him this way. She said, you know, I'm not interested like this. I care more for a relationship that brings us a family, brings us together, closer to Allah Azza wa Jall. And he insisted and she refused completely. So later he said, so what? I'll marry you regular.
I accept. Can I talk to your father? She said, that's my father. She said, I didn't believe him. But anyway, he proposed, he married her, he made a wedding, cost him sixty-five thousand with the best wedding you can imagine, the best food, the best so and so. Six months, and he divorced her without really, she just woke up in the morning and then she found the divorcing paper. You know in Shia you cannot do that. So he went to the other school of thought, and he said, I want to divorce her.
She said, okay, just divorce her. You know with the other school of thought you can divorce now with a text. You know, I want to divorce my wife, and then she will send a message, you're divorced from your wife. But with us, you cannot do that. Why? Because you have to have the supervision of a Sheikh. You know, a Sheikh, he has to come to you. He said, no, please my son, change your mind. He goes to the lady, please change. Why? Because we don't want to destroy the family structure.
So a person sometimes he got angry, he cannot just say you're divorced and then she will divorce. Anyway, so he divorces her in other form, even though they're both Shia, but he want to just finish. And she woke up in the morning, she found the letter next to her. It's very very aggravating. If I even I know personally those who are those people and it happened two years ago. Anyway, so you he she opened and there's a divorce paper and she didn't know what's going on.
She called the Sheikh, he said he cannot divorce you this way anyway. And anyway, they called that guy. She called them. She said, What's going on? Like, are you making it's a joke, right? Just last night everything was fine. He said, you see, I cared about one thing. Just one thing. And you didn't want to give me this thing, and say this way. So I get you the way that you want, and I get whatever I want from you. And I left, and this is how I wanted this way.
You see, so can we blame now the regular marriage for that? Can we say regular marriage is a failing institution? Because look how people are using it? No, we cannot do that. Because if a person is misdoing this, then it's not the system, it's the person that he's doing this kind of thing. Same thing with the other thing. If a person, he's not, he's not, he doesn't not feel God, he does not feel Allah, he will use anything to get you for the ladies, for the men.
He can use anything. He can use Imam Ali, Imam Mahdi. He will say, I dreamed yesterday with Imam Mahdi, and he said you can go marry her. Boy, because he's lying. You see every single one he has a track. He has a reputation. He can use the regular marriage or he can use the mut'ah marriage for him to get this physical feeling. But Allah, he allowed that for Muminin, why? Because he does not want them to commit Zina. He does not want them to commit fornication.
He even we have some narration from Imams, they said, "لولا عمر حرم المتعة لما زنى إلا شقي". And if Umar, he did not say mut'ah is forbidden, nobody will do any fornication except the people who want to go to hell by their land. To that point, all Muslims that they do now fornication, and why? Because, for example, now they go to their university, they have intense feeling together. How much did other we have if, for example, in our community people, have very intense emotion with someone else, but their school of thought does not permit them to do this marriage.
So it's easier for them to do fornication. And even sometimes, one of the guys he said, you know, I got introduced to this lady and we've been friends for two years and we have intense physical emotions, and does Allah want us to suffer? I said, no, no, he does not want you to suffer, but he wants you to control yourself. That's why he's giving you these things for you to control that. He does not want you to be like an animal.
You know, he does not want you to go from woman to woman. No, he said I'm not talking this way. I'm talking about that this lady, she does not accept that. And even though she wanted, but she wanted it in haram. She does not accept this way, because she believes that's haram. So I said, you know, she does not believe in it, but she's ready to do haram. Then let's her do the first haram that she doesn't believe in. But she still she said, really, she said, me going with you, even getting pregnant would be easier than marrying you.
To that time. Why? Because as much as they talked about the subject, the Ulema from the other school of thought, they feeling so bad when they do it, even if they're thinking about it. They think a woman, a Shia woman, she's more in a morning getting married mut'ah to someone and then at night she's marrying to someone else. You see, those people they don't measure the humanity. They don't measure the human as a human, they measure it as physical thing.
And now you see in Iraq, they're selling women. You see, with us, it never happened, we never sold woman, we never even many people, for example, if we believe that some men they're getting used to, they're getting used woman, but the woman is allowing them to do so. It's not the man, because, for example, a man is beautiful, he's elegant, and he is trying he's using his way to get her. But believe it or not, ladies have a feeling from the very beginning of the relationship, and you can adjust that for me, say it wrong or right.
In the very beginning that they know that this man is with them for love or for physical form. Because Imam Ali, he said something, he said, there is no way, when someone he has intention inside his heart and his tongue does not expose it, there is no way. For example, someone will start talking to the lady, he's very nice, you know, he's always funny. He always presents himself in a nice way. The first time, second time, third time he asks her something physical.
Then there's a problem. It's not that the mut'ah system. No, there's a problem with that guy. If he's immediately after a few weeks asking you that, then there's a problem. That guy, he's going from place to place just for that. And if the lady accepted that, then that's her problem. Why? Because she's allowing that man to continue with his ways. He has a place and he been using them always, and she's allowing him to use it more and more.
And the problem is with who? With both those people, not the system. Why? Because a respected person, he will never do that until very later. Let's say if after a few times, I mean, a long time, a little bit long time, I don't mean like years, just a little bit long time. And then there's really intense emotion, and this guy and the lady, she's sure that this guy is not going from woman to woman to woman and doing because you know, it's easy to track things.
They're not like before. I mean, just small software in a cell phone and you know everything. It doesn't require more things. I'm not saying to spy on each one of us. No, I'm not saying that. I'm saying it's easier now. I always know that ladies they have this fifth sense that they when they see a guy, they will know maybe he's very beautiful, maybe he's cute, maybe he has his own ways, but they know that he's a cheater or not.
They know, they feel it. But some of them, they say, no, you know, he really starts swearing that and you will start know that this lady, she's lying. Why? Because all what she wanted, physical thing, too. So, but Allah still, even if he's trying to like he destroyed that emotion, whatever you did with that guy was halal, but under the supervision of Allah. You see? This is where the guideline. Allah he care about the halal way.
He care about the blessed way. Why? There's many many many many many new marriage happened, they happen after their mut'ah marriage. Why? Because the guy was sincere, and the lady she was sincere, too. And they were having this relation, this beautiful relationship together for like a couple years during, for example, university or something. And later, they really fell in love, they're very deeply in love with each other and, now they decided now, it has to take it to the second level.
And Allah because he permitted them to be together this way in the beginning, they took it to that second level because they're both are sincere. You see, so the system of Allah is the best system because he know we have strong emotions inside us. And this is something come directly between, like we always care about food, and after food we care about the physical things. And because this is the reality, Allah he know that, and we're always tested by that.
And why we're tested, for example, when a grown-up man after 15, 16, 17, all what he care about is this thing. The lady is all what she care about being a mom, marrying, establishing a family, Subhan Allah. So over here, we have Allah is trying to do balance. Why? Because at 24, 25 years old man, he will marry the younger woman. Why? Because they are both now are not sure, while this guy is trying to be growing up. So while in this time, Allah he said for that man, it is bad for you.
I'm sorry to say that, but because since we open this subject, you know, the man cannot go into masturbation. It is haram, forbidden in every way you can imagine for the man to do any type of masturbation. Why? Because Allah during the masturbation, even now I've been watching in now they have an American channel, they teach why masturbation is so good for the man and woman, and it's very healthy, and doctors always recommend it.
In reality, it is anything that has a relief, it's good for the body. But this form, in this form, it will destroy their brain. In what way? Always in masturbation, you have to have a picture for someone to mis- I'm sorry to say that, but when you imagine him, he will turn your emotion on. Right? So who will be inside this picture? If a person does not know anybody that he's not in any relationship, he that's why he's doing masturbation, basically, because if he's in relationship, or if he knows ladies outside or a lady or he have emotion for someone, he will be with her.
He doesn't need masturbation anymore. So a person who go to masturbation, what he's imagining then? We cannot imagine what he's imagining because he will start imagining something haram. Get tango, even I've been reading the lines and Google, you know, search about this thing. Sometimes his sisters, sometimes his mother, sometimes, yeah, it will come up to that point because a person now, he's an intense moment and he needs something to take him to the second level.
What he can do? There's only those ones who's around him, right? There's only those ones who's around him, right? And while in doing that, Iblis the devil will be there and he will insert those pictures. How he's going to destroy you? You see, the devil, he's busy. He's not like you think he's now because now you have emotions and you have needs. He's not like you think he's now because now you have emotions and you have needs.
Now the devil, he's going to leave you alone. No, he's going to be there. You have to go to know someone and and if you cannot commit to be in a culture like in building a family, Allah he permit you Zawa or what? You have to go to know someone and and if you cannot commit to be in a culture like in building a family, Allah he permit you Zawa or what? Or you can do which is mean just try to fill up your time with sports, reading, writing, doing those things.
And then and this is the best. This is the better than marrying and that while you're doing that, Allah you're preparing yourself to marry someone and you you do a family with and then you won't be disturbed emotionally because if someone just going to go after this one, believe it or not, even the people you think they are other players, This is the better than marrying and that while you're doing that, Allah you're preparing yourself to marry someone and you do a family with and then you won't be disturbed emotionally because if someone just going to go after this one, believe it or not, even the people you think they are other players,
they are disturbed inside. Emotionally inside they're they're disturbed completely. Emotionally they they they need something in their life, but they don't really what is it exactly. And they're they have a psychological problem. Even the womanizers, they have very deep psychological problem. Allah he tried solving that by what? By his permission, something under his permission. So that's why we always fight over this.
He doesn't care or not, but he care more to be not to be fornication. And Allah he want you to have your rights, your rights by by Allah since he gave you this strong, you know, this strong feeling, he want you to do it the right way. He doesn't care or not, but he care more to be not to be fornication. And Allah he want you to have your rights, your rights by Allah since he gave you this strong, you know, this strong feeling, he want you to do it the right way.
If you cannot do it this right way, then you do and this is better. That's why Allah he he he he put this one inside this religion because he knows look how much now we've been all teenagers, we passed by this ages, we passed by those feelings. Alhamdulillah, some of us now were married, some of their their little little older, but this one may be little less intense than before, but there's always new generation. And if now when you did all whatever you did in your life and then you want to come to when you're 30, 31 years old and something and you're going to start saying, all this is haram, destroying the culture, destroying the family, then who's going to take care of those people?
That's why Allah he put this one inside this religion because he knows look how much now we've been all teenagers, we passed by this ages, we passed by those feelings. Alhamdulillah, some of us now were married, some of their little older, but this one may be little less intense than before, but there's always new generation. And if now when you did all whatever you did in your life and then you want to come to when you're 30, 31 years old and something and you're going to start saying, all this is haram, destroying the culture, destroying the family, then who's going to take care of those people?
Who's going to take care of those emotions? Why? Because those men are not ready to do any commitment and and the women they don't want any commitment because they reach a point in their life that they said we need something physical, but we don't want to establish a family. Because at the very end, people still need for that man and woman. And even now if you look at at the cultural system, always little older woman who always go after that with a younger man.
It is going now. That Allah he will it is bad for someone to abuse any system, the regular marriage or the marriage. Because those men are not ready to do any commitment and the women they don't want any commitment because they reach a point in their life that they said we need something physical, but we don't want to establish a family. So Allah he is opening a way for that too. You know, like like what are regular marriages like the for the guy at least the woman has to be from Ahle Kitab, right?
If you study this culturally, you study this religiously, you study from any point of view, it will take you away from masturbation, it will take you away from disturbed emotion, it will take you away from many things, but it has to always be in a right way. With you don't abuse it. That Allah he will it is bad for someone to abuse any system, the regular marriage or the marriage. I hope I explained everything or you need you have anything questions?
Let's say some some ladies, some American lady they say, you see, we don't believe in some we believe in in God in general. You know, like what are regular marriages like the for the guy at least the woman has to be from Ahl al-Kitab, right? I mean Ahl al-Kitab, right? Ahl al-Kitab, yeah. It has to be Ahl al-Kitab believing in Allah Azza wa Jalla. For example, when someone reflecting to that, it even happened before with friends.
Let's say some ladies, some American lady they say, you see, we don't believe in some we believe in God in general. We believe in a superior form that created everything. This is it. This Allah, this is what he want. We want someone who believe in him. For example, when someone reflecting to that, it even happened before with friends. They call, they said, you know, we have emotions with this lady so and so, I know her for a lot of time now and do you think I should do that with her or something?
There is no mut'ah with someone who doesn't believe in Allah. He'll say, yes, it will be. And he said, how can I do it? The first question, does she believe in God? No, she does not at all. No, they have to believe in Allah as Allah, not Jesus. There is no mut'ah with someone who doesn't believe in Allah. What about Christianity, Jewish, it doesn't matter? They have to believe in Allah. What about people who believe in the Trinity?
Like they're not considered a Kitab, are they? Even okay, so because he's a haj, he he he chose, like I knew somebody who did that and I knew that he did he took that route because he's a haj. I have a question. So I understand the whole topic. However, basically just to clarify things. So if a guy is like a hajj, okay? And he is wanting to date a girl and he does the mut'ah. Even, okay, so because he's a hajj, he chose, like I knew somebody who did that and I knew that he took that route because he's a hajj.
because the lady knows that he's with her for this reason, right? And everybody knew it. It doesn't matter. When when someone know, for example, you come to the house and you rent this house, you say, I'm going to rented it for two years and this is the contract and this is the money. You know, it's not just. No, I'm just saying like because he's not he can't go out and just regularly date because the lady knows that he's with her for this reason, right?
And I'm sorry I'm using this example, but I don't have any other example. So, for example, if someone is going to rent a place and then he in his intention that he's going to take it one month and and he's going to run away. When someone know, for example, you come to the house and you rent this house, you say, I'm going to rent it for two years and this is the contract and this is the money. So both people, they know.
But if you come, for example, even in American law, you come, I don't want to compare marrying someone to the store or something or taking a renting. But this is the closest example. And I'm sorry I'm using this example, but I don't have any other example. So, for example, if someone is going to rent a place and then in his intention that he's going to take it one month and he's going to run away. But they wrote in a contract it's going to be all his life.
However, she didn't and because she wanted to be like the girl who changed him, it didn't work out. So Allah, he permitted you for less time and no commitment. No feelings of her. You see, so many time many times that guy was the end of the day, yes, exactly. Well, at the end of the day, like they ended up having a slip because she wanted more than that. I think she thought maybe he could see past the physicalness, but obviously, I mean, from the beginning she should have known.
However, she didn't and because she wanted to be like the girl who changed him, it didn't work out. Yeah, but is this the system's problem or her problem? And Allah the the the act of zawaj, and the contract of marriage. You see, so many times that guy was the end of the day, yes, exactly. Many times the guy will change. I know many cases that lady she changed that guy and then he really fell for her. You know, and then I know I can do whatever, no.
But you see, this is her problem, but in the very beginning the system is clear, the contract is clear. And Allah the act of zawaj, and the contract of marriage. If she later if she decide to do divorce, this is mean she's breaking the contract. You see, same thing that mut'ah is a contract that that's known by what, by setting the time, by what, for this this reason. You see, when I marry, for example, my wife, I didn't go to the secretary of state saying, she's my property.
You know, and then I know I can do whatever, no. Many people they don't go physical like deeply physical when they marry mut'ah. She's in with her consent that she's going to be with me with my consent. Same thing we're going to be together. If she later if she decide to do divorce, this is mean she's breaking the contract, you see, same thing that mut'ah is a contract that that's known by what, by setting the time, by what, for this reason.
You know, and Allah is permitting that. Oh, yeah. I was going to say, like, does it is like, you know, like when you're talking like it has to be like a contract in the sense that like everything's out in the open such that like both parties know exactly what the standards and the like the limitations are and stuff, right? Exactly. Does the like do the physical like limitation have to be set out too? Like, for example, somebody says like, I want to do mut'ah and like the most physical I can get is like holding hands.
Does that have to be set? There's guidelines? Yeah, there's guidelines. With this marriage, with this marriage is a contract. Whatever set in it, it has to be followed. For example, I want to marry this lady, mut'ah, and she we we both agree that she can show me her, for example, her hair and we can hold hand and that's it. We have to follow if we go more, then we'll be fornication. That breaks the mut'ah, yes. Yes, yes.
So it is like a contract. It is like even messes, for example, if she wants more, and you and you are in the seconds for more than what you both agree, then you change this matter. You have to repeat it back again. She will say yes based on the new rules. And this is the time and this is the they will give her what? Or they will give her something for like the exactly like the same marriage. Yeah, for example, it would give her the Quran or ring or money or whatever it is.
So it's all organizing very standard. And very yeah, very yeah in in this form. What about if a if a man is married and he has and he has like another an assigned and he doesn't allow her? He's not have to do that. Yes, he's allowed because Allah he said in the Quran we talked about this before, we we said a man is created different than a woman, but a man equal to the woman and the woman equal to the man, but they're both are different.
Allah created the man even in a blood, blood, they call sensing the blood, sensing the blood inside the blood, they discovered even not from my face, not from my head, not from the narration, not from the Quran. Go open Discovery Channel on YouTube and write the signs of lust. You will see how Allah created man. Immediately when he see a woman, his emotion will start moving, even if he does not want them to move. This is how how they did it, they got a man, they with a TV and they put the mapping system in his brain.
Immediately even if he's married to someone, he's not thinking about her, he will everything will start acting like he is going to be with her. You see? A woman is completely different. A woman is she has million filter, million blocks. She does not think immediately if she trained herself to think. She has to change what Allah created. And a man, this is his test, he has to change that inside him. He has to change it by time, but yeah, he is allowed to do that.
Yeah, why? It is the system of what? We go back, we talked about it before on the reflect fest. There is 70% woman in any society and 30% men. What about those women? For example, every man married to a woman, there will be left 40% of women, what they're going to do? They're going to be what? They cannot commit fornication, adultery that the system will be messed up. So what exactly the solution? Right. And this is by British institution, not Islam.
They said the only the only solution for that is a man marrying more than one woman to to feed all this uh. Exactly, yeah. Well, you'll have to have the commercial on the first flight. I'm sorry? You'll have to have commercial. Look, that that there's one thing said, and this is what Allah gave there's rights for a woman. What is it exactly? He has to provide for his house. He has to provide for her completely, 100%.
He has to provide for her kids. If those are three met, then she does not have anything has to do anything with him anymore. You see? She has he has to provide her completely. So when she's for example, if she going to go marry someone else, if she go to the judge, then say, for example, this guy he's not giving me money or something, he has to go do it. He has to do it. He has to support his family. But if all those are met and 100%, then he has he allowed to do it.
So what if he's not supporting it's haram, right? Yes, it it will be haram for Allah, yeah, it will be a fake contract. It feels like you're doing it and you're not supporting it. You as even being you would know this is a fake contract. I'm not doing what I'm supposed to do. So basically, so basically it's not it doesn't like have stand doesn't stand on its own as fame. It doesn't stand for anything. You see because of what's going on these days, it is hard for what I'm saying to be comprehend, especially specifically for ladies, why?
Because before even with, even with the religion in general, there was no dua, no dua, they say, please Allah. There was no dua, even they didn't make any dua like this. We have a dua that say, Allah, please send me money. Allah, please pay off my debt. Allah, is very mean, you know, my neighbor. Do something for him. You know, there's many like these dua, but they never been dua, please Allah let me marry. Why? Because before there was no problem.
A lady, she would know and she would recommend even you see with the Prophet Abraham. She couldn't get kids, she told him, go marry someone else. He said, no, I don't want it. She said, please go do it. It was allowed, why? It was fine. Now we have so much arrogance, why? Because the system, they want a lady to be very arrogant, why? Because only she need to own someone and the man or you need to only own someone. You see, in reality, we don't own each other.
Nobody own nobody. But the system of Allah, because ladies live more, because men are consumed faster in wars, in many things, Allah he permitted that. Because why? For example, a man all day long, he is, you know, he is involving with his what? With his millions of hormones, and the hormones of the man is more physical than the lady. Lady, you know, she deal with her emotion more. A man, he deal with his body more. He use his body more.
That's why Allah Azzawajal allowed it, not because he's discriminating the woman. You see, when we say one for one, no, there's there's no equality. And when we say one for two or one for four, still there's no equality. The equality is made by each one knowing what he has to do and each one knowing what exactly has to give. You see? And that's why even if you say, for example, when they say Islam, you're allowed to marry four women and they start laughing at us,
in reality, this system in Middle East was there. A woman, if you really need more than one wife, he will do it. And you will see nobody is doing fornication. Why? Because everyone is set. There is no woman, for example, is she's not married. Everyone is married, everyone happy, and there's no divorce. These days, a man and woman always uh they're owning each other's, like now these days. And you still see the man is cheating, you can consider cheating.
And then a woman she going to go cheat too. She's going to go cheat with who? There's 30% men and 60% women. So she's cheating with who? She's cheating with someone married or she's cheating with someone single. Then what you're creating, you're creating a mess. Why? Because nobody know who's the kids of who these days. Yeah. So Allah Azzawajal, he said this way, if a woman know what she want and the man the man, you see the only the healthy thing by psychology, even now they have a show for that.
A woman even always with a woman. And and there's they're gonna they're gonna become to a point that it's going to be boring in their life. If this guy does not bring anything, that does not break the this this kind of relationship with something else, it's going to continue to be boring. You see, it is it actually, I'm sorry to say that, you know, I'm going to that subject. It is healthy to do that.
Allah Azzawajal created the man this way because he knows that some women need that outside. When Allah Azzawajal looking at the society, he's not looking only for you or for you or no, he's looking in general. There are some women are single. Why they're single? They have rights. They ask Allah, please, you know, we have feelings, we need they do halal thing. We have we need we need a man in our life and all men are married.
So what what how how is he going to solve it? He has to create a man. He's able to do, take one more one woman and the two women at the same time. Exactly. And they're going to going to go to the different field, whatever like the the physical trafficking or so and so. Why? Because because because we are committing to the society what it's telling us right or wrong. But even the West now, even in Britain, they they they come to the point that one day it's okay for a man to marry two women in Britain.
Because now there's 65% women, there are 35% men, and even 20% of them are turning gays. So what's going to happen to the ladies? You're going to find 10% men and 60% ladies, who's going to So the the only only solution is what? We go back to the same thing. Let's suppose somebody that was single. Yeah. Based off of what I read, I don't know if this is true, I'm trying to clarify with you. Somebody that's single and they want to get, you know, they want to go ask for a girl to speak to her and the father doesn't allow it.
Now, they I I know that if somebody's going to commit he's going to he's going to commit to doing with with a girl, she obviously can't be living under her father's household, correct? Without his permission. She can't do that. This is depend on the Maraja. Some Maraja they said if she's she know what she's doing and she's supporting herself in a way of she's no, you know, like for example, she's 25 years old or 24 years old. Right, she has a career.
She has a career, she know what she's doing, she think for herself, you know, the guardian, yeah, because Allah Azzawajal, he allow the guardianship to the point that when the people they know what they're doing. Now, let's suppose But some they say no, I'll I'll use myself as an example when I was getting to know my wife. Okay, and we were younger in our late teens. Yeah. And I used to go out with her on a date, and I used to hold her hand, and all of that stuff was haram.
Let's suppose I went and I asked her father, Yeah. Can I do with my wife? Yeah. And then I mean with your daughter. Yeah, culturally, you know, go based off of a contract. Yeah. But based is this considered a mut'ah like based off a contract to'll say, yes, you're allowed to so it's not haram, I'll do a contract in a way where I can't do anything physical, but I can go out with her to the movies Yeah, if yeah if he accepts it, you know, out in public with her.
So, but that has to be under the father's permission, because she's younger and she's still living with him and he's supporting her and whatnot. Wasn't that still considered mut'ah? No, this is a permission. This is a different thing. Islam even allowed that kind of permission without that I heard that there still has to be a contract and it based off of the father's Yeah, it'll be 100% sure that they can they can take it to the level of mut'ah.
As for example, someone who's getting to know a lady, as said before and she's for example, and he he came to the house and he said, "Can I see her hair or something?" She's allowed. Ulamas said, "Yes. She can do it very fast." And she's sit down and he will bring his iPhone and start taking pictures. No, very fast. Why? Because, you know, a lot even in Islam, it's important to have physical relationship too. You know, he doesn't want you to marry someone who don't really know. Right.
You know? Yeah. So, it doesn't stand if the parents don't hang, but So, the parents have to give the permission for the if she's still living with If she's still living, yeah. If she's, let's say 16, 17 years old, let's say 20, 21. Yeah, but if she's stupid, yeah, she has always So, so, so that's not considered mut'ah yet? Huh? Hijab that's considered father You are going to What is mut'ah? Mut'ah is is is a contract.
This is a contract too. Yeah. This is under that. So, if her parents don't know, then it doesn't it's not right or doesn't it? Or not halal, but I mean it is halal, but No, like for me, what I do with my wife, for example, going out with her to the movies with Although her mom although her mom know and whatever I'm talking I'm talking about like in general like still was right. Can I can I just conclude Yeah, go ahead.
اللهم صل على محمد وعلى آل بيته الطيبين الطاهرين. اللهم صل على محمد
Motaa , the other marriage in Islam . How Allah (swt) permitted the relation ship between the other sex , and how he governed the intimate relation ship between each others . Lecture by servant Mohamed Moussa Email : itsmoe1@live.com